Pants Up Drama Down - 5/20/2010 The Art of the Phone Call

Here is the link for the 5/20/2010 show: The art of the phone call... ;-)
http://apps.attainresponse.com/MediaF5/liveRecording.htm?id=106531

Once again, the show was a good one. My thoughts... 

From that first call... can a man call and not be seen as desperate? It depends on what he says when he calls. If he calls in five minutes and sounds like desperate (and that is in the tone as much as what he says), he has blown it. 

If he calls just gives a quick short comment... it was great meeting you, you are an attractive woman.... something on that order.. she will not only appreciate it, it will stick. 

If a man is really interested in a woman, there is nothing wrong with calling and showing it. If you are interested and holding back, she will wonder if you really are interested. 

I agree with the guys that if you are living in the same household or spending hours together frequently... that all day conversations on the phone all the time aren't necessary. I also agree that a man doesn't want to hear all that gossip nonsense (actually, neither do I)... 

But there has to be middle ground and a relationship is about 2 not 1... so for a man to say, I don't talk on the phone, I won't talk on the phone, I won't call... is all about him... If his woman needs that connection.. it really is to his benefit to find common ground... a two second... I was thinking about you, I just wanted to hear your voice... just called to say I hope your day is good...  will reap you some hellafied (yes I made up a word)... benefits later... 

Think about it... she needs something from you, you won't budge... she starts to distance herself bit by bit... the more she needs, the less she gets... the greater the distance...

Now flip it... make the call... and preface it by saying... I just have a second... see if her attitude is different later... Make love to her mind and the rest follows... the thing is, you have to know what things do that. You have to be willing to step outside your comfort zone. 

Men always talk about women passing up good men.. and vice versus... being "good" means nothing... its about what you are willing to give to the other person... and if its a phone call... is she worth it? 

Ok... I saw the show and really???? Wow!!! All I've got to say is that if a guy ISN'T calling? I'm GONE. I definitely DON'T like it when a guy doesn't call. It just lets me know that they are NOT interested in me or they're with someone else or that I'm not on their mind.

Wow!!! After hearing that show, it really made me wonder if it's possible to have a long distance relationship with a guy I like. If he's NOT a phone person, he doesn't call. We can email, text and all that but eventually, more frequent calls are needed and if they're not coming in (the calls) and another guy gives me attention, I'm outta there. Now THAT'S straight no chaser! LOL

This no calling thing really messes with a woman's sense of how much you care about her ESPECIALLY if she likes to talk to her man.

And if you're NOT calling??? Don't ask me for a sammich, don't ask me for sex, don't ask me for NOTHIN'. LOL

Bottom line for me is that if you're NOT willing to put in the time (ie... we haven't seen each other in a while and we've not talked on the phone in a while but you want to sex me without putting in some phone or face time before doing that)... don't ask me for NOTHIN' because it ain't going down.

Heck... I have dropped guys for this very reason.  He's not a phone person but yet he wants sex.  Ummm ummm ummm... no way no how.  We email, we text but you'd better be putting in that phone time (if we can't see each other face to face) or if we see each other on the regular but there's very little phone time, that's SOMEWHAT cool... depending on how it's handled. 

Ooooookay....